Listening Twice

When I used to sit with the older tap dancers (some 4 times my age at the time) and they would recount stories from the hey day of tap dancing I would often hear the same stories repeated. But I never acted bored because I’d heard the story before, or let on that I wanted to hear something different.

Without failing, every time a story was recounted, a new detail would emerge. Different parts of the story would have emphasis. I would hear things differently, different parts would matter more depending on where I was in my journey and other information I had learned.

If I had let on that I’d heard the story I would’ve missed out on this depth of experience. I may have remembered the facts, but not the weight of their experience, and definitely not the reason a particular story always kept coming up.

If you have the opportunity to hear stories especially from those of an older generation, just listen. Twice or more if need be, and let them share. Don’t correct them. Instead, ask them questions. Draw them out so more of their memory is enlivened. We’ll all be better for it.